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Chapter 4

    MR SALTEENAS PLAN

    Mr Salteena woke up rarther early next day and was supprised and delighted to find Horace the footman entering with a cup of tea.

    Oh thankyou my man said Mr Salteena rolling over in the costly bed. Mr Clark is nearly out of the bath sir anounced Horace I will have great plesure in turning it on for you if such is your desire. Well yes you might said Mr Salteena seeing it was the idear and Horace gave a profound bow.

    Ethel are you getting up shouted Mr Salteena.

    Very nearly replied Ethel faintly from the next room.

    I say said Mr Salteena excitedly I have had some tea in bed.

    So have I replied Ethel.

    Then Mr Salteena got into a mouve dressing goun with yellaw tassles and siezing his soap he wandered off to the bath room which was most sumpshous. It had a lovly white shiny bath and sparkling taps and several towels arrayed in readiness by thourghtful Horace. It also had a step for climbing up the bath and other good dodges of a rich nature. Mr Salteena washed himself well and felt very much better. After brekfast Mr Salteena asked Bernard if he could have some privite conversation with him. Well yes replied Bernard if you will come into my study we can have a few words.

    Cant I come too muttered Ethel sulkily.

    No my dear said Mr Salteena this is privite.

    Perhaps later I might have a privite chat with you Miss Monticue said Bernard kindly.

    Oh do lets said Ethel.

    Then Bernard and Mr S. strolled to the study and sat upon two arm chairs. Fire away said Bernard lighting his pipe. Well I cant exactly do that said Mr Salteena in slow tones it is a searious matter and you can advise me as you are a thorugh gentleman I am sure.

    Well yes said Bernard what can I do for you eh Alf?

    You can help me perhaps to be more like a gentleman said Mr Salteena getting rarther hot I am quite alright as they say but I would like to be the real thing can it be done he added slapping his knees.

    I dont quite know said Bernard it might take a good time.

    Might it said Mr S. but I would slave for years if need be. Bernard scratched his head. Why dont you try the Crystal Pallace he asked several peaple Earls and even dukes have privite compartments there.

    But I am not an Earl said Mr Salteena in a purplexed tone.

    True replied Bernard but I understand there are sort of students there who want to get into the War Office and notable banks.

    Would that be a help asked Mr Salteena egerly.

    Well it might said Bernard I can give you a letter to my old pal the Earl of Clincham who lives there he might rub you up and by mixing with him you would probably grow more seemly.

    Oh ten thousand thanks said Mr Salteena I will go there as soon as it can be arranged if you would be so kind as to keep an eye on Ethel while I am away.

    Oh yes said Bernard I may be running up to town for a few days and she could come too.

    You are too kind said Mr Salteena and I dont think you will find her any trouble.

    No I dont think I shall said Bernard she is a pretty girl cheerful and active. And he blushed rarther red.